Am I the Only One Tired of Reading Inspirational Success Stories?
You know the stories I mean, right?
- “How I made $10,000 in one month on Medium.”
- “Getting Started in Writing is Easy!”
- “Three Steps to Becoming a Successful Blogger in 2020.”
- “How I Started a Successful Blog and Bought My First Porsche While Backpacking Around Asia!”
Ok, the last one was an exaggeration. A bit. And then usually there’s a FREE* guide either to landing work as a freelance copywriter or to how to work 30 hours a week and make $120,000 year.
We’ve all heard it before, and for those of you who aren’t lying: great. I mean it: if you’ve succeeded that way, that’s awesome; you really do inspire millions of people including myself and I wish you the best.
But at this moment, I am tired of it. Because I can’t seem to get anywhere near there and it’s not even what I want.
Here’s what I want: I want to slowly and daily make enough progress so that in a year I can leave my crappy bank teller job, move out of the trailer park, have the time and money to support some foster kids or maybe even adopt some children with my wife.
I don’t need to be an online nomad or Twitter guru, I don’t need to be able to visit 39 countries in the next 5 years, I don’t need to post pictures from my 68th story penthouse #InternetMoney #Blessed.
I want plain, blissful Mediocrity — happy and unarousing in her long skirt and short jacket.
Is this bitterness? I don’t mean it to be and I don’t think it is. It’s really just frustration. The internet has provided access to more opportunities than ever before, but it has also given instant access to the most successful — and that can make us plebians feel very much like plebs. Social media platforms including Medium automatically curate content from the top 1% because that content tends to be the most interesting and the most helpful. It’s not oppression, it’s the new reality.
I’m just burnt out from feeling that I don’t measure up.
Take-Aways — In No Particular Order
First, let me say that I still believe in freelancing or at least side-hustles.
Blaming my situation instead of blaming myself is a surefire way to make sure I’m never successful. Here’s the secret to empowerment: take responsibility. If you are merely the victim of your race or privilege or circumstances then you’ve already surrendered your future to forces you cannot control.
I refuse to do that. I recognize that everyone has unique challenges, but I believe we all have the ability to write our own story and overcome them.
That being said, here are some takeaways from Self-Help Burnout:
Don’t Compare Yourself to Others
Compare yourself to yourself. Compare who you were yesterday to who you are today. If you are better in any way, if you made any progress, if you managed to be consistent in a good habit even just one more time, then go to bed happy.
You can’t be someone else. Especially in writing, we gain our voice by copying someone else, but at some point, you have to make them only a part of who you are. Otherwise, you are just a cheap copy and no one likes those tacky knock-off brands.
It’s tough to remember this when I’m about to head out to my dead-end job reading about the next hot trend or habit that made someone else successful and free already. But I remembered today. And that’s better than yesterday.
Besides, They Already Had Experience
People who wrote those “How I Made $10,000 by Writing This Month” didn’t start from zero like you probably did.
They spent years at an agency, sometimes decades working for a company before deciding to strike out on their own. I don’t want to take away from the courage it takes to do that, but I do want to highlight that they DIDN’T START FROM ZERO.
They had experience. Even Shaunta Grimes who recently started an anonymous Medium account to see how hard it is to “start from zero” isn’t starting from scratch. She has decades of experience, she knows the niches that pay best, she has a lifestyle built around writing already. Don’t try to compete with that if you are actually starting from the bottom.
Also, Their Experience Gave Them A Network
Robert Kiyosaki, author of Rich Dad, Poor Dad, notes that the poor and middle class try to improve their job, but the rich improve their network.
Most of the stories I read from successful writers are from people who built up powerful networks while writing for someone else. When they “got started”, they already had ready clients and contacts, people who knew and trusted them and would recommend them to others.
Yeah, they “only started freelancing a year ago” but really their networks gave them a huge head start.
The good news for you and me is that networking is easier than ever. There are thousands of gurus and micro-influencers scattered throughout Twitter, LinkIn, Medium, Quora, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, Telegram, etc. who are highly accessible and eager to help.
The internet has made networking easier than ever, you lucky duck! Take advantage of that.
Take Care of Yourself
People who are successful also have incredible drive and take care of their mentality and energy. I have no good tips on that. I just know it’s important.
Here’s one tip I guess — find what really relaxes and recharges you (hint: it’s not Netflix). I asked myself recently, “what do I really like to do?” and was shocked when I didn’t have a good answer.
Some people can work 16 hours a day. Others can’t. Find out who you are and be content with it. Find out how you relax and take at least one day a week to do that.
You have a moral obligation to take care of yourself because you have a moral obligation to take care of others and give them your full potential. You can’t do that if you are a hot mess of frenzied nerves and impossible expectations.
Conclusion
I guess this was just an open letter to those who are struggling and frustrated. To sum up:
- Not everyone’s super successful. Be ok with that.
- Hang in there, kid. You got this!
*It’s not free. Go YouTube the same information for actual free.
